They crack me up at 4am!

I'm bored, and yes I know I should be sleeping, I should have started my Summer School assignment which I have not done so, I should have started studying for my mid sem which is in 4 days which I have not done so; I've been pretty much slacking for the past 2 days already... Gahhhhhhh...

But but, before going to bed, as I read through my weekly updates from FML, this list of funny things never fail to crack me up! Well most of them anyways:P


-Today, I checked my Facebook notifications to see that someone likes my new single status. My ex. FML (OUCH!)

-Today, I got a biology quiz back. I had drawn a dinosaur on the back of the page, asking for extra credit. When my teacher handed it to me, I turned it over to see that he had drawn a caveman shooting arrows at my dinosaur. It was bleeding. Profusely. I didn't get the extra credit. FML (LOLOLOLOL at this seriously:P)

-Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML (Don't wanna know that teacher's teaching:P)

-Today, I got my cell phone bill. I pay for 700 minutes per month. I used 9 last month. FML (Except, how can you not know that you only used 9 minutes when you know you are paying for so much?)

-Today, it was my 18th birthday. Nobody said anything. Gillette sent me a free razor though. FML (OUCH!)

-Today, my friends thought it would be funny to try and break a watermelon on my head while I was asleep on the couch. FML (OUCH!)

-Today, I added some of my own money to the tip jar in the Subway I work at to make myself look less pathetic. FML (That's sad)

-Today, after 8 years, I confessed one of my best friends I've been in love with him since we were kiddies. His answer was "Don't worry, I won't stop talking to you." FML (Confession failed!)

-Today, my brother and his friend ambushed me, tied me to a chair, and put a sock in my mouth. My mom found me 10 minutes later, took the sock out, and asked, "Why are you tied to a chair?" I told her what happened. She looked at me, laughed, stuffed the sock back in my mouth, and left. FML (A very awesome Mum indeed!)

-Today, I had to pull cheese out of my PS3's disc tray because my younger brother assumed all PS3's could grill stuff because "Youtube told him." FML (Well Youtube said so:P)

-Today, at a bar, a woman approched me and tried to set me up with her friend. Looking around, the only people in the bar were a man reading the paper and a very ugly woman, looking at me and smiling. I worriedly replied, "I'm sorry, but I'm gay." Turns out her friend was the one reading the paper. FML (EPIC!!!)

Alrights, time for bed now! Toodles!