Depressed mood.

Today is the day.

I cried in the exam hall.

I studied it this morning. I was more or less certain I got it. I glanced at the paper. What's the formula? I don't remember. How do you go about working it out? I don't remember.

I stared at the clock. It was 9.30am. I've got time to do it. But, how?

It was then 10.30am. I've still got time to do it, but, how?

At 11.30am, I broke down. Like those kids who were made to give their first speech in front of the class. They got nervous, and it caused them to cry saying they can't do it. I was there, tears in my eyes, because for the first time, I had this mental block. Nothing is in my head, at all.

There were however, many other things flowing through my mind. Disappointment. Mum's gonna kill me. Summer School again this year?

For the first time, I actually wanted to leave. I actually wanted to walk away just like that, leaving everything behind for the others to clear up for me. I'm sick and tired of this life. Perhaps Finance wasn't suited for me afterall.

Now go say whatever you want to say about me. How I never study. How I never put in any effort. So now you think you know me well? You think I never really tried? I may not be as conscientious like you; I may have procrastinated more than you; but you cannot say I never tried. It hurts to know that these friends aren't your true friends afterall.

Anyways, enough of this. I've thought of the worst scenario already. It would have to be Summer School again, no home again, grumbling from Mum again, so on and so forth. All I wish now, is a PASS. I don't want more, I don't want less, I just want a 50. I just need a 50.